What do women want………

What do women want…………..

Women want it hard and they want it straight!

(In every way, shape and form)

 

Whether   women are looking for love in church, tinder match.com regardless of what your ideal is of finding the perfect guy or the perfect match… All women can agree in this men just be straight, literally just be honest and keep it real.  “Am I fat in this dress”, yes tell me exactly where the love handles are bulging out and can you see my cellulite through the dress.  “Am I Fat”, literally does mean am I fat don’t tell me I look lovely and have everyone in your family staring and commenting on my recent weight gain whilst I’m scoffing my second ok maybe third cake with the icing on top into my mouth.   Above everything else just be honest.  Women want honesty however brutal, however hard just be straight, we’ll love for it eventually. Maybe not tomorrow but in time you’ll be the best ever ex anyway.

I couldn’t care less about men even women who (Under living in a patriarchal system have lost their familiarity with their feminine side).  No Judgement!  Come on denote me as a girly girl, a fundamental  feminist living in a fantasy world with cliché romantic beliefs on the notions of true love and soul tying.  I am, and yes I am in to all of that, love at first sight, the magical  first kiss , butterflies every time he calls, I mean EVERY TIME!    No less than 6 months of dating will inevitably lead me to start planning in my

 

head all the different ways he’s going to propose.   However  in my defence that’s only because he wanted commitment, loved me unconditionally and defined as “serious”. Continually insisting upon his passion for monogamy and indeed for me .  So naturally six months in all going well as a red blooded almost perfect woman … (If I do day so myself).  I’m going to believe this is going somewhere preferably down the aisle and my dating days are OVER whoo hoo!

Then all of a sudden out of the blue the beginning of the end emerges.  He starts behaving really distant, no longer spending much time and effort and then wait for it the beautiful lie emerges this relationship isn’t working . “It’s not you it’s me”, and I literally cannot be in a relationship with you anymore because the dog ate my homework. Of course he doesn’t have a dog and homework? I mean he graduated from university years ago, so how does that makes sense…… That’s his lie and he’s sticking to it.

 He’s making a run for it as fast as he can and in order for him to get to his destination real quick,( the arms of a twenty something sharing my dreams of a perfect future with him).  The only thing I can do is hold the door open as wide as I can, in order to be sure whilst I’m slamming it shut behind him that he’s actually gone and another one truly has bitten the dust.

Then comes the late night phone calls to your married girlfriend’s, relentlessly telling you that he was an arse and you can do so much better. The Ben and Jerry’s cookie dough ice cream,comes out of the freezer and the independent woman inside screams inside of   you don’t need a man. You’re big and grown and perfectly capable of making it on my own.  Notwithstanding the explicit mental threat to   Sky, if they advertise re runs of “The Notebook”, one more time the direct debit is being cancelled!   After the sleepless nights are over and you start to learn to love yourself again, the real pain of the break up really begins and you’re not hurt that he left because you don’t need to convince yourself you deserve better you already know.

It’s not that he left, it’s that he lied. No they are not the same thing. Lying about why you’re leaving is one thing you must respect his ultimate goal is leaving.  My issue is why lie whilst we’re together you didn’t need to say “I love You”, “I want to be with you forever”, “I’m not going anywhere”.   All the perfect cliché’s of a stable, committed, loving relationship.  All you need to do is lay your cards on the table do you want a relationship from the beginning or do you want  a relationship with no strings attached.

Where are all the straight talking alpha males that are going to give it to a woman hard and give to her straight, where is the, “I’m only looking for a bit of fun”.

Where are those men?  Where are the “I’m not a commitment kind of guy”,

Where is the, “I like you babe but if you want marriage or to settle down I’m not really there right now, but if you want to hang out………”

Where are the men?

 I don’t want a little boy with commitment issues telling me all I want to hear so he 15 minutes of my time.  I want a man who’s going to man up and it like it is, tell me I don’t want anything serious. Don’t lie and refute my choice in the situation. How rude?  How unfair?  How totally and completely dishonest.

My Pastor told our congregation a few years ago that there is only one difference between a boy and a man, just one.  “Boys dilly dally, men make decisions”.  A boy will dance around decisions, constantly changing his mind.  Today is yes and tomorrow is no.  A man is sure of himself. Sure if he wants a relationship, sure if he wants a bit of fun and sure as hell if he wants to marry you! A man will be sure to tell you exactly how he feels.  My advice to men is women want a man an honest man, we’ll leave the boys to the girls.

I’m for the truth no matter how brutal, no matter how honest. Just give it to me hard and give it to me straight.

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